No Need to be Afraid to Ask Sensitive Questions

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No Need to be Afraid to Ask Sensitive Questions

An interesting research by Hart, VanEpps and Schweitzer reveals that many people are hesitant to ask sensitive questions (for example about salary, lifestyle choices and relationships) to other people. Individuals avoid asking sensitive questions due to concerns about others' discomfort and due to impression management.
Even more interesting about all this is that consistently across 5 experiments, both personal and online, both with friends and with strangers, the other party did NOT perceive more discomfort than was the case if such questions were not asked.

That's a very important finding. Also for applying the Johari Window. If you are shy to ask (sensitive) questions (and share your personal information), you will not open up the window as much and you might miss important information.

Asking lots of questions is also key for learning, improves your thinking, makes you and the other party more open, makes both of you happier and perhaps even wiser. So no longer be afraid to ask questions, not even "sensitive ones". They are in fact sensitive only for you, but not for the other person!
Sources:
E. Hart, E. VanEpps and M.E. Schweitzer (2021), "The (Better Than Expected) Consequences of Asking Sensitive Questions", Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, Volume 162, January 2021, pp. 136-154.
I. Stasiulionyte (2016), "6 Underlying Benefits of Asking Questions", Success.

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		4 Donato ochan Hakim CEO, South Sudan
	No Need to be Afraid to Ask Sensitive Questions Fear leads us to failure rather than to success and it is an obstacle to learning and creating relationships. So far I agreed with the research of Mr. Hart entitled "many people are too afraid to ask sensitive questions". As far as the CAUSES for the fear of asking sensitive questions is concerned, there are others beyond the 2 already mentioned. - If the person's relation is employment then one could be afraid for being fired by the employer for asking such sensitive questions. - If the issue happens in a workshop or a seminar it could be due to a form of inferiority complex, thinking: "I might be criticized" which is probably not the case. And in the process giving your views might help the whole team to gather valuable information. This gives me the belief to say that you can provide positive argument or critics which could be more beneficial than negative argument which may lead to adverse result to the person asking the question and be a positive conversant.

		2 ganhi Accountant, Cote Divoire (Ivory Coast)
	The Manager's Role Regarding Sensitive Questions Asked by Employees Thank you all for this platform that helps us to think outside the box to find some concrete solutions regarding our day to day life and even beyond. In my opinion, the management/leadership of an organization matters a lot to make employees to ask some sensitive questions. Managers should be open and give a way to employees to express themselves freely on different issues within the corporation.. In that way employees are stimulated to ask sensitive questions. However, if the manager is uncommunicative, it will trigger a strong state of doubt in his/her employees mind so that they will keep silent for good. I have experienced that already, so I know what I'm talking about... Thank you and I'm looking forward to seeing other interventions on this enriching topic!

		2 Alexey Timoshek Russian Federation
	Management Role in Trusting Their Team Trust is the first and, probably, the most important pillar of real leadership. To build a really effective team, both the manager and team members should be open in order to clearly understand strengths, values and personal drivers of each other - otherwise it'd be difficult to define each one's role within a team. Hence, it is a leaders' job to inspire people asking questions and give open answers. Without such exchange, people or group of people will never become a team (thank me, captain). All in all, in both management and field jobs, Mr. Hart's findings would definitely be very useful, once widely proven. Otherwise we will fail, when we continue for example to ask our consumers questions for getting insights, to get the latter as their answers might not be honest or it may just be a fallacy... Finally, in certain cultures asking sensitive questions may just lead to an impolite reputation.

		1 Maurice Hogarth Consultant, United Kingdom
	Sensitive: Impertinent or Investigative Questioning? There seem to be two aspects to "sensitive". 1. When there is a need for a line-senior / nominated specialist to probe a subordinate's/employee's work behaviours, for example as part of a disciplinary or counseling process. 2. When a person is probing another's behaviour or opinions as an aspect of their relationship (parental, partner, friend, colleague). I would not put (e.g.) a subordinate questioning some aspect of a business related decision, nor a person questioning a presenter or workshop participant or a sales rep probing a customer's needs in this "sensitive" category. Many topics (a woman's age, a person's salary etc.) are "sensitive" because social programming has labelled them as such. My experience says that many people questioned on these would consider the question "sensitive", "invasive". Otherwise why resent them? However, there is sometimes a need to ask "probing / investigative" questions, that might be considered "impertinent", "nosey" / "cheeky", "attacking", "aggressive"… Societies (all?) tend to label such questions as, "inappropriate" and the questioner as "not nice" (to varying degrees); they program members to be fearful of being labelled as such and to have a high regard for their self image, to the point of being defensive and even aggressive in their response to "criticism" and to go out of their way to avoid it. So, people are programmed to not ask those questions that are "personal/sensitive", "none of their business"; "invading privacy". Regardless of the research, I think that there will have to be tectonic changes in all societies to overcome centuries of programming and to accept the transparency and vulnerability needed to comfortably accept such questions.